Spies, Thieves and Revolutionaries by insertafabuserhere

Name: Spies, Thieves, and Revolutionaries

Author: insertafabuserhere

Genre: Fantasy, Adventure


All Dinah Ahmadi wanted was better living conditions for the people of her tribe. Instead, she got the chance of a merciless revenge. A chance that will turn her world upside down.

Motivated by all the wrong reasons, Dinah revolts against the Crown. Desperate for help, she relies on a shady traveler, an exiled prince, and a retired prostitute turned brothel madam.

She journeys the Empire with her band of misfits, meeting mysterious, mischievous creatures, and rallying troops for her cause. Guided by her flaming blood lust that will only be satisfied by the sweet nectar of revenge, Dinah awaits the day of judgement.

The day the guilty will burn.

Link: https://www.wattpad.com/story/46488045-spies-thieves-and-revolutionaries


Chapter One. Great opening paragraph. It really captures my attention. The description of her mother’s outfit was a bit overwhelming, but it wasn’t too bad. I like how the relationship between the MC and her sister is revealed through their interactions, instantly of being blatantly stated. I know it’s hard to avoid, but it would be better if the chapter avoided repeating the MC’s name too much. For example, in this sentence, it is actually a bit repetitive. (“Dinah opened one eye as her mother and sister sat on the rug, across from Dinah.”) In my opinion, the information about the title of Matriarch and the test was a bit unnecessary in this chapter. It would be best to possibly hint at it, then explain it more in detail in a later chapter when it would be more appropriate. Remember, you don’t want to overwhelm the reader with too much information in the first chapter. Dinah has a good sense of humor. I like her commentary about the tax money, and her even sharper tongue when she approaches the king about it. There is a lot of good characterization in her conversation with the king. I have a strong sense of her character, and what her morals may be.

Chapter Two. What an eye-opening start. It’s a very bold way to start a chapter. I like it. So far. So good. The descriptions provide a good view of the scene, and we start to pity the MC and what she has lost. I especially love how (“Destroyed.”) is its own paragraph. It really emphasizes the point there. Some of the paragraphs toward the middle of the page are rather large. I’d recommend shrinking them, or separating it to make it easier for mobile readers to read the story. The ending was solid. I had an inkling of suspicion when the King so easily agreed in the last chapter that I was not surprised at the outcome. It really makes you appreciate the foreshadowing from the previous chapters, and once you connect the dots, the outcome makes a lot of sense. Hm. Well, the story seems good so far so I don’t see any reason to continue with the review. Instead, I’ll let you, the reader, go check out the book and enjoy it for yourself. As always, thanks for reading this review, and have a great day/night. Until next time, good luck!~


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